Great works of Yasmin Ahmad - Reunion Dinner 2008

Tale of an orphan. Very touching.

Great Works of Yasmin Ahmad - CNY: Old Folks

How much does your son earn? Well, he's here to bring me home. That's worth all the millions in the world. =)

Great Works of Yasmin Ahmad - Tan Hong Ming's Love

One of the purest and sincerest ads the world has ever seen, by Yasmeen Ahmed. Watch and be inspired. I was. =)

Great Works of Yasmin Ahmad - Mukhsin

A beautiful tale of puppy love. "Everyone has a first love story to tell", captured the hearts of all.

Great Works of Yasmin Ahmad - Gubra

Sequel to Sepet, where Yasmin deals with tricky but all so prevalent issues such as illness and death in family; prostitution, motherhood and being living with HIV; matrimonial reconciliation and adultry. Her courage and honesty is at it's best here.

Great Works of Yasmin Ahmad - Sepet

A chinese boy who peddles pirated VCDs and a middle class malay girl whow loves chinese movies? Why not! Yasmeen spins into this thought provoking love story controversies and taboos so often swept under the carpet. Watch and be awakened.

Goodbye Yasmin Ahmad

Scanning the movie reviews section in the newspapers few years back, i came across a bizarre looking piece. Bizarre because it was actually singing praises for a local movie. Yes, i shared everyone's prejudice against local movies. I thought to myself, "Haiya, must be about some pontianak, hantu or some shallow love story lah!"

But then, the title caught my eye ~ Sepet (meaning slitty-chinese eyes), one of my nicknames back in secondary school. So i thought, hmmm, what do you know. Needless to say, that title pushed me to the nearest VCD shop, walking out 5 minutes later clucthing my very first orginal VCD. I told myself, any film maker who has the sense to pick up such a common yet poignant word deserves my full support. And yes, i never regretted supporting this film maker's efforts, up till her very last movie.

Her movies, Rabun, Sepet, Gubra, Mukhsin, Muallaf & Talentime have won multiple awards internationally. We Malaysians were never really fortunate enough to watch all of her shows, or full versions as they were either banned or heavily "edited".

However, nothing could stop us from believing in that beautiful picture of Malaysia and it's multicultural people Yasmeen painted for all of us. I can still hear that raw but real conversation Ah Keong had with Jason at the hospital about the Chinese perception of Malays, in Sepet. It made me proud to speak our brand of English that is heavily peppered with hokkien and other local dialects. Now, for once, Manglish no longer stood as a national embarrassment but as our national identity. It was as if Yasmeen was saying: "What is there to be ashamed of when this is a fact? Be proud of who you are!"

Yasmeed never failed to dig out the little things that make Malaysia enchanting. For example, her favorite movie sets were small towns (like Ipoh), colonial buildings (particularly shop houses with the bamboo chicks and narrow wooden satircases), kampungs and padi fields, coffee shops, mamak stalls, VCD stalls, the sarong, the plastic and metal recliner, our united passion for cantonese soap operas, bollywood offerings and thai songs, just to name but a few. She made sure we saw the beauty in these little things that so clearly define us as Malaysians.

Interacial marriages were presented as a fact rather than a peculiarity in all her works. In her latest commercial, Funeral, Yasmeen put this point across eloquently. How beautifully she spun the tale of a wife putting up with her husband's snores at night and finally coming to miss those sounds at the wake. "Beautifully imperfect" was how Mrs. Lee described her husband to her band of friends and relatives at the wake. But what was truly beatiful was the fact that Mrs. Lee was in fact, an Indian lady. Again, Yasmeen waved her magic wand and made us realise, regardless of race, we still love the same way, however imperfect that may be.

It is this ability to speak the language of the heart, and the knack of capturing it on film that will be sorely missed by all Malaysians. We have all come to expect, yes, expect, tought-provoking, inspiring, heart-warming and tear jerking Pertonas commercials during festivities. How sad it is that we now have to do without them. It is as bad as having to do without the ketupat, mandarin oranges and even muruku!

Many of us have not had the pleasure of knowing Yasmeen personally, but most of us have opened up our hearts to her messages and even acted upon them. The impact she left behind is, indeed, profound. So here's to you Yasmeen Ahmed:

May you rest in peace in the kingdom of thy maker!

A world without walls

I like it in the middle of the night, when it's quiet and i can think.It's just so difficult to think when our lives are at fast forward all the time.The noise. The excitement. The thrill. The threats. The love. The fear.There's no time or space to reflect on what matters most, or infact what goes through our lives on a daily basis.

I made decisions in life that, well, some i'm proud of. And of course there are those i'm not so proud of.Either way, i still have to stick by them.Coz whow knows? Decisons are tough to make. And it's even tougher to see where they take us.It's easy to speculate and guess but hey, reality poses it's nasty twist and surprises all the time.

I made a decision to leave behind what others may call a legacy and walk towards the unknown.Some are happy for me and well some are not.That is life. Can't please everyone.And it is never fair.The only thing i can be true to, is well, myself.What i truly want to be. What my heart tells me i should pursue.People often say, once you walk away, there is no turning back.I wonder why is that? Why should it be that way?Why should there always be one or the other? Isn't there a third option? A middle Way? A compromise?

I chose to walk away from something i built my life round.Yet today, i went back.Well, at least just paid a visit.It was an experience, to say the very least.The people whom i thought i hurt making that decission, whom i thought no longer wanted to have anything to do with me, well, they welcomed me back into their lives with open arms. And most importantly, an open heart.

I cannot find words in me to express that kind of feeling i have right now. It is overwhelming.How strange it is that as human beings we tend to jump to conclusions all the time.Pass judgements and stubbornly stick to our own moronic opinions.Not knowing, infact, we are imprisoning ourselves. Punishing no one else, but ourselves.Gosh, what took me so long to return?

What took me so long to see, that nothing changed. The one thing that changed, is me. No one else. Nothing else.That is what i liked about reality. Too much time and worry lines are dedicated by man to conjectures of the mind. Trapping ourselves in these illusions, hallucinations.

I think it is time we, as human beings, should open up our minds, our hearts and welcome people, as they are, into our lives.Too many arguments, fights, resentment, disappoinments, frustrations, have been built on our baseless opinions of one another. It is time to stop. It is time for all of us to LIVE.To live life. To embrace it, with all its flaws and blemishes. I believe it is important that we all do that.

Stop all the speculations about each other. Stop all the conjecture.Stop all the hang ups and pretence. Stop all the judegments. Stop all the blaming. Stop all the expectations. Stop pretending that we don't care. Stop being jaded. Instead, we should all start caring. Start accepting. Start having hope. Start having faith in one another. Start helping each other, not run one another down. Takes us no wehere.

In short, we should start living, loving and believing. Believe in all the goodness that is just there inside of each and everyone of us, all around us. Give it a chance. Let it flourish. Stop second guessing each other. I think truly, that would be the best gift we can give to any one person, any one being, in this very world. Life's too short. Spend it the way you'd want to remember it. Spend it the way you want others to remember you.Here's to all who have known me all through my life. Cheers!

不患人之不己知，患不知人也。Fear not that others fail to understand us, but fear instead should we fail to understand others.

A sound piece of advice extrated from 易博天下http://www.umpaper.com:8081/blog/blog_news_detail.jsp?pwid=1172

Loosely translated for the benefit of my "No Speak Mandarin Friends".

孔子说：不患人之不己知，患不知人也。 不怕人不知道、不认识我，而是担心自己不懂别人。如果能认真去了解别人，还会与人有误会矛盾吗？还会有冲突吗？还至于要拳脚相见吗？然而要真的了解别人先得认识自己，认识自己就要不断地学习、不断地反省自身。知人先知己，求人先求己；知人又知己，人知且己知，人和人还会有对立敌对吗？ 凡事要反求诸己方可与他人共立、共求、共谋、共进！

Confucious has this remarkable saying very close to my heart:Fear not that others fail to understand us, but fear instead should we fail to understand others.The crux of the saying is this, never fuss about others being inconsiderate or insensitive towards our own needs. Instead, be really worried about not knowing others' dispositions.

If we really take the trouble to know and understand the people around us, would there still be misunderstandings? Will there still be clashes of opinions? Will there still be preconceived notions? However, we need to really get to know ourselves before we can even begin to understand others. Knowing ourselves, well, is a process of life long learning and constant reflection.

And so the saying goes: "To know others, know ourselves first. Set the standard upon ourselves before placing demands on others."

Think about it, will there still be hostilities and contentions when there is mutual understanding, consideration and sensitivity?Whatever it is, demands and expectations should always be pinned on oursleves first, not others. Only then can we be united sharing the same dreams, execute the same plans and advance together!

The Art of Mentoring

「诗云，『伐柯伐柯，其则不远。』执柯以伐柯，睨而视之。犹以为远。故君子以人治人，改而止。」
"In the Book of Poetry, it is said, 'In hewing an ax-handle, in hewing an ax-handle, the pattern is not far off.' We grasp one ax handle to hew the other; and yet, if we look askance from the one to the other, we may consider them as apart. Therefore, the superior man governs men, according to their nature, with what is proper to them, and as soon as they change what is wrong, he stops

~ basically meaning as mentors to others, we should respect the fact that people basically are individuals, with their unique characters, strenghts and weaknesses. Strive to help them make the most of their abilities, dispositions and talents. Refrain from forcing people to fit into moulds. Help them overcome their weaknesses and shortcomings. Then stop there. Never cross the line and end up overbearing. It is, afterall their life. Their choice, how they want to live it.

And it suddenly dawned upon me...

"Do you know the meaning of this symbol?", the guide was pointing to the swatiska found engraved at every Buddha's chest.

I chuckled at the question. Geez, how many times must i be asked this question, "Oh, yeah, it means peace and universal love for all. It's the opposite of the Nazi sign which means destruction and dominance."

"There's another meaning, you want to know?" the guide smiled ever so benignly whilst the sun cast a warm glow on his brown face, casting him in a saintly light against the backdrop of Marble Mountain.

He didn't wait for my reply."It looks like a wheel and it gives the meaning of rotation, meaning there is change. It is a Buddhist tennet that all things, worldly matters, are constantly changing. Nothing is spared. Everything is thus impermanent. The Buddha realised this, and hence preaced it to all beings, be prepared, nothing last forever, do not cling on to anything because it will only cause you grief. Be open to change and accept it happily, that is the way to live, to live a fulfilling, joyful life."

I stood there, mesmerized by the depth of his understanding. A gentle breeze with a lingering fragrance touched my cheeks, almost as if the Buddhas and Bodhisattvas are saying, we're here, he speaks the truth. Mum and Dad joins us, standing by my side, listening to this wonderful dharma.

"The Buddha says, change always happens, you are born a baby then you grow up, marry, have children and then you grow old. This is easy to accept and be happy about. But the Buddha is great because he even accepts sickness and death. He says, be happy when you get sick, accept it, it is a phase in life. The Buddha even accepts and is happy when it was time to die, because he has served his purpose in the world.This is the dharma, nothing is permanent, so too our lives. That's why we should do good all the time, every single day of our days, every moment, every thought. Then we have no regrets and can happily accept death when it is our time." He concluded and locks his eyes with mine, as if asking, "Do you get this?"

Sigh, i've translated hundreds of dharma lectures and have heard this principle expounded in numerous ways, been touched by it's raw truth and have on many occasions earnestly resolved to be of service to all to the best of my abilities, till my very last breath. Why? Just so this life is not lived in vain, that i will look back at it and say, "Yes, i have done everything i can to the best of my abilities and yes, i can go now. No regrets." That was and still is my greatest wish in this life.

Snapping back to reality, i saw mum and dad still standing by my side. "How much longer will they still be by my side?" the question urgently popped into my mind. I refelcted upon the happenings of the week, we've been a merry band celebrating my younger brother's wedding in Vietnam, enjoying every conceivable luxury within our reach, revelling in all the joy and happiness this union brought about. We met Joe and Bill (Rae), Kate's Australian god-parents and been inseparable ever since, almost like having a brand new set of grandparents.Life is great! Life is wonderful! Life is full of joy!

Suddenly there is a sense of urgency, this will all come to an end, worst still, i don't know when. I know when the holiday will come to an end, but nothing can prepare me for the rest. Beyond my control, helpless.Mum and dad are getting so much older, though they are young at heart. As it is they their bodies are giving way to creaky bones, age related diseases and all sorts of woes common to the elderly. Medication control their deterioration, age defying creams halt the wrinkles, trendy clothes hide their age and gives us this impression that they are fine, and will be with us for a long time yet, casting the illusion of happiness at this point. Deep down, i know, this will not last. One day, i will have to accept that they will no longer be able to climb Marble Mountain with me, explore the ruins of MySon or be right here, beside me when the dharma is expounded.

I looked at my brothers, though they have always been here for me, throughout my life, supporting and cheering me on in every single aspect of my life, i realised, one day, this will all come to an end. They will have their own lives to lead, their fair share of trials and tribulations laid out in matrimony and setting up a family, and it will come a time when i have to stand on my own, i will have to be there for them and be what they have been for me. I will have to grow up. I will have to change. I will have to take responsibility. I will have to do my duties, as a sister, a daughter and take on every other role life calls upon me to undertake.

My brand new sisters-in-law come to my mind. Once barely even acquantainces, then suddenly part of the family. Imagine the transition they had to make, i'm sure nothing in life prepared them for this sort of change too. Especially having to get used to an unconventioanl family like ours. Imagine Kate who has to bridge her Vietnamese culture and village upbringging to our Malaysian culture and urban lifestyle. Imagine Siew Min who has to get use to speaking english and hokkien in our midst when her language at birth is Mandarin and Hainanese. Imagine getting used to our hot and spicy fusion palette at meals, so different from her traditional plain, bland chinese food.

All this seem like small things, but it is the small stuff in between that make even the bravest souls knock at the knees. I do believe it cannot possibly be any easier for both of them.

Then it dawned upon me. It is not my task to fret over potential change, dred it and live in a constant state of apprehension. It is in fact my role to embrace it, take it in my stride and handle it gracefully. Change, that is what i have to prepare myself for. Change is not something to be feared. For fearing change is like being afraid to live. It is a fact, which in different circumstances bring about varied consequences. That is all there is to it. Change defines life and hence embracing change is, in plain words, living. Abhorring change is, on the other hand, rejecting life.Clingging on to what we love, like, enjoy and possess only compounds our own misery when it is taken away. Dredding what we loathe, fear or do not understand only makes the journey that much more painful and laborous.

I realised i should not be caged in my own fears nor keep on second guessing what is instore in the future. How we live our lives, the quality of it, is our very own choice, hence our own doing. There is not a single person or situation to be blame how we are living.It became clear that i should do the very best that i can in every single task entrusted upon me and any challenge thrown towards me, without fear or favor, then i would have lived. I would have lived a full life, utilised the skills and talents i have and will be acquiring along the road, bestowed upon me for good measure. I woulod not have forsaken the kindness so many have showered upon me, especially by my parents, teachers, elders and of course, the Buddhas and Bodhisattvas.Realised just in time, time to open up my mind.

As the Buddhist Patriachs often says, roads open when minds open, essentially meaning an open mind opens up limitless options, opportunities and even solutions. Accept change, embrace it, be interested in it. Avoid the crevice of jadedness. Never be so jaded that the mind is slammed shut against diversity, options and even miracles. Never jump to conclusions even before giving the situation a good chance to prove itself. Never give up hope and most importantly, never give up living.

And it suddenly dawned upon me, time to live.

Don't get caught!

昔有山伯英台化蝶飛，復有小喬周瑜長情義‧自古情難斷，瀟灑揮袖有幾人？驀然回首望，萬骨成灰夢一場！多少世間兒女為情痴，為情狂，深陷庐山却懵然不明其真面目，待黃粱熟了，才發覺覆水经已難收。情欲，醉人，却也腦人...Received this message on Valentines Day this year, thought it was a BIG JOKE! There i was, waiting for sweet nothings, pledges of eternal love...ladidah...but got this instead, from well-meaning folks i suspect (but thanks ayway, whoever you maybe!)Oh well, at least forewarned is foreearmed.So, moral of the story: enjoy it while it last, shed a tear and move on when it's over.You'll be so much stronger and wiser when you get over. I did. I lived. =)Life...so short, so interesting. Best part is, you make it what you want it to be.Choose wisely.

Tree roots thriving and winding along the mountain's marble-rock surface. This is up close, seen from a far it's quite magnificent. Just like how love snarls unwittimg souls, beautifully, magnificently from afar, but who knows the pain and trouble suffered silently? Still worth while?