Woke up feeling like the will and body are separate entities. Showered and drove to the mechanic's coz he called in the middle of the night asking for a huge favor to return his power tools conveniently left in my car booth. On the way there, the car radiator meter shot dangerously to red. $h!t. Made it to the workshop and guess what, it's locked shut. Called the mechanic. "Oh, you're in front of my workshop....errr...sorry....i'm still in KL." Yeah, sorry. I'm sorry too. I'm sorry i didn't just stay in bed, or have a leisurely breakfast, or watch Oprah...whatever.
Drove over to Big Guy's apartment to drop off the power tools so dear Mr. Mechanic can pick it up from there. Meter shot to red. Grrr.....was thinking to myself, "I'll make him take off RM 30 from my bill, delivery charges."
Ok, pushed my luck and drove back. On the way mum wanted breakfast, so called my trustee kopitiam and placed an order for nasi lemak to be picked up on the way. Car started doing Mambo Number 5. Pulled up at the petrol station. All the McGyver and Worst Case Scenario better not be a waste of time.
Popped the bonnet, $h!t. It's steaming hot. Ok, i've seen the mechanic do this before. Went to the tap with 100 plus bottle in hand, filled it up. Watered down the radiator. Forget the facial this week. There's enough steam to open up any pore for anything to flow out. Hmmm...wonder if stubborn flab flows out that way too? Ideas....
3 giant bottles later, tested the radiator cap with a rag. Ok, all clear. No signs of gurgling, spurting fountain like threat...YET.
Was silently congratulating myself when suddenly the cap popped and there...the Fountain of Youth, right before my eyes. In this sad case it was the fountain of rust. Geez...now i know why the radiator is heating up even though it's always full. It's full of rusty water. Rust = metal. Metal heats up faster than just plain water. No wonder Mr. Mechanic says it's time for the car to go to automobile heaven or a painful overhaul. Painful to my pocket that is. So yeah, i'm sorry i didn't just stay in bed.
Back to the story. Thank goodness i dodged in time. If not i'll be blogging for a face transplant donor. Thought it would be a disaster but hey, wasn't as bad as i imagined. Whatever is supposed to be under the hood were still under the hood and in tact...ok, except for the radiator cover that was stuck under some pipes. No biggie. Retrieved it with my trusty bamboo stick (this is another story all together).
Moved on to rescue mission stage 2. Got another big bottle of water and filled up the radiator. Not enough, one more bottle went in. That's when i realized, not gonna help. Coz i could see the rust floating up...again. I knew this would just buy me enough time to pick up breakfast and head home...if i'm lucky. Popped the radiator cap on and signaled for mum who's enjoying the air-conditioning in the petrol station convenience store. Strangely, the men at the attached mechanic workshop left me alone to my own devices and did not offer any help. Maybe i looked like i knew what i was doing. *Grins*
"All done?" Mum asked. "Acid test, see if the engine will start or crack lar." I replied.
Well, it started. I was hopeful once more. The meter behaved until about 3km down the line, started to threaten to go red again. At least we reached the Kopitiam. Mum jumped down to pick up the food while i parked and switched off the engine, and ....PRAYED. what else? I mean, who wants to be stuck on a Sunday with nasi lemak on board, not knowing if i'll be scorched to death by the sun or drowned by unexpected thunderstorm? Which by the way is happening EVERYDAY.
"Let's go." Mum jumped back in. "Ok...." engine revved to life, and so did the meter. So close to red. I made a dash for it. Seems the faster i went the more time i buy to stall the meter from going red. There's hope....then, traffic light turned red. Wait. RED. It's like a signal for Mambo Number 5 again. Imagine an old man with hypertension, diabetes and whatever nonsense an aged body can develop on Viagra. What happens? Stroke, right? Same thing. Poor Herbie suffered a stroke. Right under that God forsaken MRR2 with all that green wire mesh that says, hey, it's not gonna collapse..which will all know one day it will. I prayed. No, a different type of prayer. Ok, ok, i sweared. But silently. Coz mum's just beside me...don;t wanna get an earful to mind my language at this point.
Like all good ER doctors, what do you do when a patient goes under? Try resuscitation right? Peddles? Tried the ignition. Spurted back to life. Ok, i'm just 5 minutes away from home. Give me 5 minutes and you can RIP. That's the deal i struck with Herbie. Tore down the road at breakneck speed. Come to think of it, the gods must have been smiling down on me coz i had to pass 3 sets of traffic lights and they were all green. Hmmm...swearing helps...hahah...nah. Thank Buddha.
Got home with the meter needle just pointing at red. Mum fumbled for her keys. Come on. Mum opened the gate. Come on. Mambo number 5 kicked in again. Come on. Steered the car in position to enter the house porch. Mambo number 5 at it's height. Come on. Don't die diagonally across the road, i prayed. It's the Jitter Bug now. Eased Herbie into the porch. I think Herbie saw a hot car. It whistled. I pulled the plug. Herbie went down.
So, with all that drama, we got the power tools to Mr. Mechanic, got breakfast and managed to survive the episode. As i'm blogging now my heart is still pumping nervously. My hands are still shaky. And i still believe staying home and facing the computer is the safest thing to do.
Anyway, Mr Mechanic will come with the ambulance to get Herbie to ICU tomorrow. It's gonna be a good 5 grand for Herbie's one week stay. But hey, Mr. Mechanic says he's gonna give me a 5 year warranty. So yeah, a grand a year. Don't know if i should laugh or cry.
Suppose it's better than getting a new car and replaying loans. By the time i'm done paying the new bugger might be doing the Soldier Boy on me. Sigh. Life.
Ok, all gloom aside, good things came about.
1) Friendly neighbor offered to send me to the train station to catch a cab for work until i get Herbie back.
2) I will get a brand new, overhauled Herbie in a week's time.
3) I learnt that certain maneuvers are best left to McGuyver and Worst Case Scenario team to carry out.
So, here's to a week's worth of Public Transport adventure ahead. Keep you posted. Cheers!
